> Journal Entry 13
I know, I know.. I’m being too harsh again. “Nobody is worth your time.” Is that really the kind of thing you want to be telling your readers? Is that really the kind of message you want to forward to the small amount of people that read your good for nothing pieces of illiterate literature? Well, let me explain.
As you may know (if you do indeed keep up with my journal entries) my life has lately been a roller coaster of work and studying. I keep saying work though. You know, it’s really fancy to say that you “work for IGN Greece” since it’s an IGN franchise and it means something, but it really isn’t work. I wouldn’t qualify it in my head as work. Not the kind one would imagine at least when you tell him such a phrase. Anyone would immediately think that “oh my god, he has the amazing chance of being part of a team that handles one of the world’s most renowned video gaming news websites and actually gets paid for it.” Well, scratch the last part.
But this article is not really about not being paid and doing tons of work. It’s really not. I love what I do at IGN Greece and I am not going to explain why there is no payment (yet) out of it. I honestly don’t mind it and I do get a lot of other things out of it that make it worth my while. Living off freelance shitty gigs ain’t the life you want to have, but I make do, so this is really not a whining blog post. What I want to talk about, is actually putting your heart into doing something, doing it with mathematical precision and excelling at things without getting the right amount of recognition.
No, not fame. Recognition from the right people is something that one would very much desire in any kind of job. Be it voluntary or not, the work you do, if done well should actually be respected in any sort of case and be esteemed by the people that work with you. I’ve been feeling like this is not the case for my line of work though lately and I had to share it with the rest of the world. It bothers me and I have to say it. It’s not just about IGN Greece, it’s not about the team or anyone, you won’t find any weird spicey issues or drama situations here, so if you are here for that, you should probably look at some other place.
My word goes out to the people that took me as one of their own in their team and allowed me to be part and boast around saying “I’m part of the IGN Greece team,” but there’s always that certain turning point. That fine balance. The silver lining in all of it. I am an indies lover and that makes things complicated.
I’ll start by saying that there has been no single occurrence in my life where I didn’t excel in anything I’ve put my lifeforce and hard work into doing. It might sound like I’m boasting, but when you want to prove a point, you need to take into account all relevant factors. I might be just 23 years old, but I have successfully managed development teams, entire communities around certain things and continuously manage to push people into doing great things. That is the reason why I’m studying International Business Management after all, since I want to do it and actually make money out of it for once.
So as some of you may already know, I recently (the past two months or so) became the Indies Press Correspondent for IGN Greece, which for me was somewhat a huge “break.” Still on a voluntary basis, but the access I have, my own e-mail plus the freedom to talk with any developer representing the franchise, is something that comes with great responsibility and credibility too. That doesn’t mean though, that IGN Greece really needs something like that.
Websites like IGN, could greatly benefit from an indies section and I always wondered why they haven’t done that yet. I mean, look at all the smaller websites here and there attracting a huge following just by doing that. If you have a huge website already, why not have, just a couple people I’d say, handle that part and at least test it out for yourself to see if it goes well. Well in this case, they allowed me to do that, but in the long run, without the necessary amount of jurisdiction in certain parts of the website, you can only do as much, and when everyone is focusing on getting the “bigger things” rolling, then not one person will bat an eye when your long-awaited to be published preview is delayed by 2 weeks.
That’s where I want to land and say, some times it’s really not worth putting the time and effort into things that you more or less know people will not appreciate or even help you develop in the long run. I could very well be sharing my entire idea here about running such a thing, but at this point, the disappointment that has covered my already misty feelings has come to take control of my writing impulsiveness as well, making me write this article too. As hard as you may try to organize things, keep things in line, make things work and actually try to do something that will make your company profit, even though you are not, in any way whatsoever, things will just be that way in the end of the day.
So it makes me look even further and think. Is this the life one wants? I mean, I will get out of uni, let’s say with amazing grades (it already looks like it won’t be too hard to do that actually, considering how easily I’m tackling one thing after another), do I really want to go out in the world and join a company with narrow-minded managers who don’t see what they have in their own human resources? Managers that don’t allow for innovation and creativity to develop? Business plans are certainly set in stone in most cases, but most companies, we’ve seen and learnt that they work when they innovate and think out of the box. And who is it that does that? New people. New ideas. The spark of innovation most of the times comes from one with great love for the business sector and even a certain niche market and evolves into something magnificent and extravagantly beautiful.
If it’s not me, then at least someone else for Christ’s sake. I don’t care if I have to keep sleeping in an 8 square meters room for the rest of my life, but I would at least like to catch a break sooner or later in that kind of matter.
First step would be, stop whining. Second step, explore more options and stop looking behind and wondering why the people above you in your previous line of work didn’t allow you to catch that break.
Maybe it’s time for a change. Maybe I should explore other options. I don’t know if it will be easy or hard to find people who will be thrilled with the idea of supporting the indies scene through my kind of plan, but I’m surely not going to stop trying. My efforts thus far have proved fruitful and my research shows good results can be achieved out of it. There’s always room for failing, but I haven’t done that before and I do not intend to start doing so now.
It’s like there’s “creativity control” around everything we do.
-Konstantinos “Kelfecil” Christakis